12.22.2008

Christmas Shopping 1-0-1

My version.

1. Plan ahead, at least two days before Christmas morning. If you really want to be ahead of the game, start panicking the week before, but don't do anything about it.
2. Don't pay attention to what your family and friends are interested in; just get them stuff you find funny. They're all just like you, anyway.
3. Now that you have no ideas, head to the downtown shopping center. Bring some company, preferably someone calm. You'll need that when you start to worry.
4. Wander around the mall for a little while, staring at stuff. Get distracted by the pretty window displays. Ponder what to get parents out loud. Said company (Boyfriend) offhandedly remarks that he never knows what to get his mother. Head directly to craft store.
5. Once in craft store, spend 20 minutes deciding what Boyfriend's mother will like. Do not leave him alone in the styrofoam section.
6. After you've found something suitable, proceed to the candy store, where you become entranced by the pretty pastel bonbons. Stare at chocolate for about 15 minutes, before helping Boyfriend choose another gift. Tell him he must never give anyone chocolate lollipops (they ruin friendships).
7. Head to the bookstore, where Boyfriend finds yet another gift, within 5 minutes. You spend 45, and find nothing.
8. Become entirely fed up with shopping, and decide to resort to last minute online buying and shipping. Spend rest of day angry that shopping is easier for men.

And that was his first try. It was my 3rd. Dammit.